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by  |  09-Mar-2015 09:14

"You're getting old."Did I mention he used to be my best friend?My un-funny friend, who is still, by the way, my best old-school-chum, was unfortunatley not far off the mark. You have simply reached the point where holding the book, or can label, or whatever it is you are trying to read farther and farther away has finally become an exercise in futility. Your arms are not going to get any longer, and if they did, you wouldn't be able to make out the print from that distance, anyway.

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We had been admonished all our young lives never to fight - never start one, never be in one. In this one instance, and this one instance only, my father decreed that should the boy even look at me the wrong way, I was to hit him.

Squinting At Things Squinting at things is not normal. If you were one of your kids, you would immediately take you to the eye doctor for a check-up. In fact, I made a career out of losing, breaking, and misplacing them - only to have them found, mended and replaced. The hated eye wear was abandoned except for going to movies. "Things" are not out of focus, your eyes are not focusing the way they used to. The first pair broke when I sat on them in the family car. "Oh, well", said my parents philosophically, "Accidents will happen." Deciding I would learn to be more careful on pain of death, they replaced the glasses, and life as we knew it continued.

For years thereafter, the glasses resided in my purse, to be donned when the lights dimmed and whipped off as soon as the credits rolled at the end of the feature. I would never, ever have to wear glasses again - right? While needing glasses as a child may be an indicator that you will need them when you grow older, it is not automatically true. I must digress and share with you a fond memory from my childhood involving glasses... I used to ride the bus to school, and one boy in particular was the bane of my existence.

The first instance of this in my life occurred shortly after I hit my 40s.

A friend held up his tray of seedlings for me to admire, and I found myself pushing them a little distance from under my nose to get them in focus."Ah," said my friend, kindly.

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